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<>  Why I Fired My Secretary

(A true story - from a Toronto Star article)

Two weeks ago, was my forty-fifth birthday, and I wasn"t feeling too hot that morning anyway. I went into breakfast, knowing my wife would be pleasant and say Happy Birthday and probably have a present for me. She didn"t even say Good Morning, let alone any Happy Birthday.

I said, well, that"s wives for you. The children will remember. The children came into breakfast and didn"t say a word.

When I started to the office I was feeling pretty low and despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary, Jennie said, *Good Morning, Boss, Happy Birthday.- And I felt a little better; someone had remembered.

I worked until noon. About noon Jennie knocked on my door and said, You know it"s such a beautiful day outside and it"s your birthday, let"s go to lunch, just you and me.- I said, By George, that"s the greatest thing I"ve heard all day. Let"s go.- We went to lunch. We didn"t go where we normally go; we went out into the country to a little private place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously. On the way back to the office, she said, You know, it"s such a beautiful day. We don"t need to go back to the office. Do we?- I said, *No, I guess not.- She said, Let"s go to my apartment.- After arriving at her apartment, we had another martini and smoked a cigarette and she said, Boss, if you don"t mind, I think I"ll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable.-

Sure,- I excitedly replied.

She went into the bedroom and in about five minutes, she came back out .......... carrying a big birthday cake, followed by my wife and children. All were singing Happy Birthday..... and there I sat, on the couch ... with nothing on but my socks and my stiffy in one hand.

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